You’re Not Stuck…You’re Contemplating

“The secret of getting started is breaking your tasks into small, manageable steps and starting on the first one.” – Mark Twain

You’re Not Stuck

Have you ever found yourself knowing you wanted and needed to make a change, but you couldn’t quite commit to it? You think about it constantly, talk about it, and you might even do some AI research on it. However, when it comes to actually doing it, that’s where things stall.

Here’s what I want you to know: you are not stuck, and you are not failing. You are in the Contemplation Stage of Behavioral Change, and that’s actually a very important place to be.

What Is the Contemplation Stage?

The Stages of Behavioral Change is a research-backed model that maps the journey people take when making meaningful life changes. There are six stages in total, and Contemplation is Stage Two.

In this stage, you are aware that something needs to shift. You see the problem. You feel the gap between where you are and where you want to be. But you haven’t committed to action YET, and that’s okay.

Contemplation sounds like:

“I know I should… but I’m not sure if I’m ready.”

The Danger of Staying Too Long

Contemplation is a natural and necessary part of change. The problem arises when you get comfortable there.

Failure to Launch

Think of it like Matthew McConaughey, aka Tripp in the 2006 blockbuster movie Failure to Launch. Everything was set up for him to move forward, but he kept finding reasons to stay comfortable right where he was. He couldn’t launch. Contemplation becomes dangerous when it stops being a bridge and starts being a residence.

Without forward momentum, contemplation can slowly and quietly turn into a permanent resting place, and what started as “I’m thinking about it” becomes “I’ve been thinking about it for years.”

This is often not about laziness or lack of motivation. It’s about ambivalence, uncertainty, or indecision. It feels like a tug of war between the comfort of what’s familiar and the uncertainty of something new.

3 Ways to Coach Yourself Forward

Instead of forcing yourself to follow Nike and “Just do it,” try these three simple but powerful approaches:

1.Connect with your Strengths:

You’ve navigated hard things before. Remind yourself of what you’re capable of. Let those strengths inform your belief system that this change is possible for you.

2.Get honest about what staying still is costing you:

Ask yourself: What is this current situation costing me: emotionally, physically, spiritually? Sometimes naming the cost of inaction is more motivating than imagining the benefit of action.

3.Think small, not perfect:

What one small change feels possible this month? Not the whole enchilada.

Transformation…just one step. Progress…not perfection. This is what moves you out of contemplation.

What Comes Next: “I Will”

When you begin to work through the ambivalence and lean toward change, you naturally move into the next stage: Preparation. Preparation sounds like: “I will.” It’s the stage where you start making a plan, gathering resources, and setting a date.

You don’t have to leap. You just have to be willing to take the next small step. That’s how transformation actually happens.

In Optimism,

Rita

This Week’s Challenge:

Take 10 minutes this week to sit quietly and answer these three questions:

• What is the change I keep thinking about?
• What is it costing me to stay where I am?
• What is one small step I could take this month?

You don’t need all the answers. You just need to start the conversation.

Rita Hudgens is a Holistic Mindset Life Coach with almost a decade of experience working with executives and entrepreneurs across the country. She is sought after as an Empowerment Coach, Speaker, and Group Facilitator because of the results people experience due to her coaching and training programs.

Rita inspires, motivates, and challenges her clients to think and act differently to get the results they want.

To work with Rita, email: ritahudgens@gmail.com or click here.